Escapism when things go Dark

sadfaerieLet’s admit it there are things that can get to be overwhelming when it comes to writing. The information, the advice, the different ways to go about writing a story, the different items that impact us as writers, and our brains going in so many different directions that we just want to yell, “stop!” This a chance for us to discuss what to do when writing becomes too much. This is not the same as writer’s block, oh no, this is when we can’t take the world and what is going on all at the same time.

My first piece of advice, is take a break. There, I said it, take a break. Now, I’m not saying don’t write but what I’m saying is take a break from the world. Turn off the Internet, and go somewhere where the world will not impact you or be on your mind for a few hours. Don’t worry, the world will still be there when you get back but take that time to focus on yourself and your craft.

When the events of September 11 were unfolding, many folks took being away from the television sets and the news coverage for a few hours. They took to going to the mountains, to reflect on what is still good in this world, even if the people in it are not so good. I remember that weekend, my family and I got into the car and we went up to Echo Lake in Colorado. While we were there, no one spoke of the event even though, every one knew what happened during the past week. Why was it not spoken of? The answer is simple, because people went to the mountains to escape the reality of what had occurred that horrific morning.

So sometimes we just need to take the escape from the world so that we are able to hone in on our craft. To say the world is fine without me for a few hours so that I can focus on the things that I care about.

Another time that we may need this escape is when we are mourning the loss of a dear loved one. Last Saturday, I lost the first female alpaca that I ever owned. To say that this week was hard, would be an understatement. The other day, if you noticed I posted up four posts, while I focused on working and writing those posts, I was in a way escaping from the thought of her passing. But then there were still points when I would think about her and I would cry.

I knew that she was in pain for she didn’t cry out loud but she quietly cried tears to show how much she was hurting. After taking her to the vet and getting the results, I made the decision that was best for her, and that was to have her put down. In the coming days, I kept asking why and what could I have done to help her. But after getting the preliminary results from the vet, there was nothing that I could do to help her for she was too far gone. She just didn’t show it until the end.

I even went to a physic for help on the matter, and I while I gained new information from the session there are still things that I want to know. This is the first alpaca that I have ever had to put down, and it was the first animal/pet that I have made the decision to help them end their suffering. Even though, her pain has been ended for her, I’m in pain for the hurt runs deep. I made a selfless choice to help her, and that should be the end of it but it is not for I want answers. In searching for those answers and dealing with the grief of her loss, I too need to escape.

Being a writer, should mean that I can put that loss into words. But I really can’t for it has not yet been a week since she has passed on to the next level of life. While I think of her and how she should be – healthy and in the pasture with others – I can only say if she was here she would be in pain, and want to live with that every day for the rest of her life.

So right now, I’m finding an escape from dealing with her loss, and that is to write. I’ve thought about The Raven Prophecy, Ravages of Time, The Zodiac Tower, and other works of fiction that I have on the back burner and I think that maybe her passing is a driving force to get things completed. But in the end when I’m not writing, I’m thinking of her and how much I want her back.

The hurt runs deeper than I ever thought possible, and there is no escaping the pain of her death.

Sorry, if this not the sort of positive ending for this post, but not every thing is happy, and rosy. But also think of those that are held captive, they have no escape from that reality for they face it every day until either their death or they rescued. Even then, there is no escaping them from that either not for a long time. I guess that is also fascinating for us writers, is that when something dark happens in our world, our view on the world becomes dark and sad like a darkened forest that we cannot get out until something new comes into our world to make us see that life is supposed to be happy, rosy and above all things something that we shouldn’t have to escape from.

While this may not be a helpful post, I still hope that you have a great writing day!

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